Self-realization is the key to enjoying a happy life. Self-realization is not what someone tells us about ourselves, although, if we ask for feedback from the people closest to us it shines a light on aspects of ourselves we may not have been entirely conscious of.

At first, self-realization can feel both liberating and humbling. When we come to understand that we have created each experience in our life, our life changes.

What or who do I have the power to change? Myself and my actions. What or who do I have the ability to influence? Everything, from changing myself through changing my perspective.

Every relationship we have is there for us to have reflections of ourselves through others. When we understand this we begin to observing instead of absorbing what is happening around us. Relationships are opportunities for us to have a deeper and more intimate understanding of ourselves. Spiritual teachers speak of not judging good or bad right or wrong. In one of my books I wrote, “Judgement says, no right to be…discernment says, not right for me.”

The energy that supports the words we use creates the effect they have on ourselves and others. Let us look at two distinct definitions with different energy behind the word judgment (source; online dictionary). Definition #1: “The ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions”. Definition #2: “A misfortune or calamity viewed as a divine punishment”.

Evaluating actions, our own and others, that lead to situations to discern who and what we choose to give our time and attention to is vital to a balanced healthy life.

Like attracts like, when we change our own vibrational frequency in the way of becoming more conscious,  people who no longer vibrate on the same frequency will no longer be attracted to one another. If we resist this reality, we are constantly reminded it doesn’t feel pleasant to hold onto something that doesn’t resonate with us any longer or serve our highest and best. When we objectively accept what is, we are reminded that we have options to make choices that create a new reality that serves us well. It is a healthy sign to continue to expand our own consciousness and awareness while being compassionate, kind and able to gently let go of what doesn’t truly serve us. A great start is letting go of resistance, regret, and resentment. Space then becomes available to be in and operate from acceptance, compassion, and happiness.

If a relationship feels good to you, it feels good to the other person. If a relationship doesn’t feel good to you, it doesn’t feel good to the other person. Taking steps to be in relationships for the purpose of elevating each other, exposing and transforming our own false or limiting beliefs while creating more love, joy, and fun is the ideal purpose for being in relationships. The truth is showing 24/7, are we willing to be honest with ourselves? Are we willing to trust and have faith that letting go isn’t quitting? Are we ready to notice that evaluating our situations is how we discern who and what we choose to dedicate time and attention to? Are we willing to objectively observe ourselves and others to see and know a greater truth about ourselves? Are we prepared to allow the self-realization that will be our biggest liberator, show us our deepest truth and inspire us to act and operate from love, faith, and compassion?

In beauty and love,



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